Sibling Stories

I was going to post this on our family blog, but I decided it really makes sense for it to be on Max's, as it is very much related to everything we have gone through as a family in the last year plus.

I went to the hospital with both Lauren and Max yesterday. Lauren needed a hip xray as they have been keeping an eye on her right hip. She was diagnosed with hip dysplasia around 6 weeks old, and had regular ultrasounds for the first six months, but by then, it appeared to be growing normally, so they have never had to do anything with it. We went through a lot of stuff like this with Lauren. Holes in her heart, hypertonic, the hip, diagnosed failure to thrive. Everthing resolved itself on its own. I still remember expecting Max's issues to resolve on their own, too, because things had for her. Oh well. Anyway, Lauren has always been a very good patient, but because of all the time Max has spent in the hospital, he plays a lot of doctor/patient games. He has a real stethascope and thermometer and a lot of play medical stuff. He practices on his stuffed animals, toys, mom and dad, and of course, little sister. Lauren plays along very well, and is a great patient for him. (See this blog entry from our family blog) She also likes to be the doctor. Well, when we went up to Max's appointment yesterday, she knew just what to do. First of all, she was amazing during her x-ray. She just lay quietly and completely still for it. This is pretty good for a 2YO who never stays still. Then, when we were seeing Max's doctor, after he got his height check, she insisted that they check her height too. After Max's blood pressure check, she hopped up in the chair and loudly announced "My turn!!" pointing to the blood pressure machine. Max didn't think this was a good idea, but the tech was nice enough to take her blood pressure. Then, because I wanted to know (she hasn't been checked in 6 months), she got weighed. After Dr. Ebb checked Max all over, she lifted up her dress, pointed to her belly, and said "Me first belly!" until he listened to her. Then, she turned around and did the same thing saying "Now, back!!" Poor Dr. Ebb ended up basically doing a full exam on her, too. We couldn't help but laugh. Then he said "I bet she has everyone wrapped around her finger." Which is often pretty true. :)

I often am often very thankful that she is so young. To her, this is all normal stuff. I do not think she realizes how much attention (good and bad) Max has gotten because he has been sick. It really has been the year of Max. Sometimes, it seems like she is the forgotten child. She has been basically dumped at practical stranger's (to her) houses when we have had to rush to the hospital, people who know every detail about Max do not even realize we have a second child, we cancelled her first birthday party because Max was hospitalized, and barely had a second one because we wanted to make sure he was healthy. When we did plan it, we had people tell us that the only reason they went to Max's was because he was sick, and that they were not going to go to two kids birthday parties in one year. She didn't go trick-or-treating last year because of Max. But, we are lucky. She is young and doesn't see the difference. I can only imagine how hard it is for older siblings of children will illnesses like Max's. I completely understand why the hematology/oncology department has programs for siblings of sick children. It must really take a toll on some of them. We have been so lucky with Max's recovery. Many people go through much more. Instead of having a child who feels that she is missing out on things, we have a completely secure and independant child who is probably a bit too trusting of strangers, but other than that, is just easy going. Once again, I count my blessings.